Bestseller!

In 1987, one of the greatest movies ever made was released. The action/thriller John Flynn-directed movie, Best Seller. It's such an awesome film. It stars James Woods as "Cleve", the mob assassin, and Brian Dennehy plays "Dennis Meecham", retired cop turned best-selling author. C'mon! It's a recipe for awesomeness. A hired assassin. A cop turned author. Together, they're rewriting the rulebook on the Mob!

Bestseller is also a term for a book that's identified as extremely popular by its inclusion on lists of currently top-selling titles that are based on publishing industry and book trade figures and published by newspapers, magazines, or bookstore chains.

I mean who hasn't heard about Sarah Palin's best-selling book? A hired ghost writer. A failed VP candidate turned half-term governor. Together, they're rewriting recent history. No, seriously. They are. There's a bunch of fact-checkers and stuff.
And most Twin Cities dwellers have probably already seen this week's cover of our very own City Pages magazine. Bat-shit crazy Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann graces the issue's cover because inside is an interview with her. Well, sort of... I mean she provides written responses to questions that were emailed to her because she refused the reporter's request for a live interview. Bachmann's people called it a "hit piece" on her, but trust me when I say City Pages is a friend of "real conservatives" everywhere... especially wayward Republican senators just passing through town. Of course I might be referring to the ads in the back of the magazine offering discrete encounters with drug- and disease-free male escorts. Or not. Michele Bachmann - If words could kill, then she'd be guilty of mass murder!
Of course, you could also manipulate your way onto a best seller list by having your friends purchase tens of thousands of your book at wholesale and then offer the book at $24 off the cover price as an "incentive" to buy a year's subscription to NewsMax! So, apparently you don't have to sell all your books to "real Americans" to make it onto a best seller list. But I know what you're saying, "So, Bogey... if it's so easy, why don't YOU do it?" Maybe I will... maybe I will. Writing a book is easy. Writing a best seller requires a dog's point of view.

Home 4 the Holidays

It's that time of the year again. I can feel it. There's a chill in the air. Talk of a Black Friday runs rampant. The president is criticized for "dithering" after he declares he wants to explore all his options before actually pardoning the National Thanksgiving Turkey. And very soon you'll be questioning your very own sanity as you sit at a table asking yourself, "Why am I here?" It happens each year, and every year you make the same promise of "never again" to yourself. Before you know it, a year has passed, and you begin to feel it. There's a chill in the air. Talk of a Black Friday runs rampant. The president is criticized for continuing to explore options. And you find yourself seated right back at that same table - surrounded by those same people - while you sit (hopefully clutching a beer or glass of wine) asking yourself, "Why am I here?"

Lucky for me, I look forward to Thanksgiving because I'm off to SoDak. South Dakota - the only state in the union where the state bird is allowed to run a tab at any tavern. Anyway, we're going on our annual visit to the headquarters of Thullner Family Farms. There's a rumor of a freshly made batch of little piglets for Claire to see. I assume the feral cat army that previously infiltrated the barnyard is still in great numbers; therefore, I'll probably stay in the house the entire weekend. Seriously. Those cats are downright mean! Momma will probably take Claire to town to visit friends, while Stew stays back because Grandpa wants his computer fixed and somehow equates "a guy that sold high quality furniture at a modest price" to "computer technician". Then after Stew successfully executes the tricky Ctrl-Alt-Delete and click "restart" maneuver he learned from a PC tech ninja, Grandpa rewards Stew by taking him for a couple cold beers at The Watering Hole in luxurious downtown Herried, SoDak. South Dakota - the only state in the union that serves its state bird for Thanksgiving dinner.

IAMS HOME 4 THE HOLIDAYS


I'm once again working for one of the world's most successful pet adoption drives, Iams Home 4 the Holidays (IH4TH). This year's goal is to place at least 1.5 million shelter dogs, cats and other pets in loving and happy homes over the holiday season (until January 4, 2010).

Campaign organizers are working with animal bloggers from around the world to get the message out about pet adoption and the IH4TH.com drive. Last year, the program’s goal of helping 1 million pets get adopted within three months was outdone when 1,202,701 pets were placed in homes — including Rumi, adopted by two-time Academy Award® winner and 2009 celebrity ambassador Hilary Swank. So, apparently, I've been passed over yet again as choice for celebrity ambassador... but watch for me in 2010!

As I think everyone knows, I am a Hurricane Katrina survivor. I, along with at least 10 other pups, was rescued from the front porch of a house surrounded by water. Then, along with 17 other mutts, I was loaded on a trailer bound for Minnesota. Two or three of my comrades didn't make it, but I was lucky. Here's a picture of me posing at the dog shelter where Stew and Momma came to meet me. And, yes, I agree that I'm the cutest puppy you've ever seen.
With nearly 8 million homeless animals in the U.S. today, and almost half scheduled to be euthanized this year alone, your support is needed now more than ever. You can help by adopting a pet this holiday season at IH4TH.com and receive a complimentary adoption kit to help with your new family member. Can’t adopt? Join the “Feed Pets in Need” program and help bring much needed food to your favorite IH4TH shelter by simply casting a vote at IH4TH.com.

Whatever you do, don't vacillate! Take action now... otherwise, you might find Dick Cheney on your doorstep snarling at you for dithering. And you know Liz Cheney won't be far behind. Yikes!

It's nothing!

Despite my fear of losing this blog's four faithful readers who are more interested in Claire and less interested in my political leanings, I'm going to continue my lovefest for Jon Stewart by showing a clip from last night's show. So I'm not blogging about Claire and our trip to Florida just yet. I guess you'll have to excuse my dithering. Dithering. Isn't that a funny word... and very popular all of a sudden. Anyway, I've also been racking my brain for the past year just trying to pin down exactly what it is that makes my ears bleed whenever I hear Sarah Palin speak while this same enigma somehow produces raging boners within the Teabagger community. Well, once again, Jon Stewart provided some enlightenment. It's the nothingness...

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Daily Show: The Rogue Warrior
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

Jon Stewart's guest last night was El Lou Diablo (aka Lou Dobbs). If you've got a free 15 minutes, then I urge you to go HERE and find the 3-part interview... it was quite good.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go prepare Claire for her Tumble Bugs class.

More mojo for Movember

I don't quote English proverbs very often, but I found one I like:
"A man without a moustache is like a cup of tea without sugar."

And since I consider myself to be a Buddhist, here's something my favorite Thai Buddhist, Ajahn Chah, once wrote:
"Looking for peace is like looking for a turtle with a moustache - you won't be able to find it. But when your heart is ready, peace will come looking for you."

Y'all might recall a little over a month ago, I told you about my Uncle Matthew's plan to grow a moustache as part of a fund-raising program for the Movember Foundation. Recently, Mattie emailed me a picture of how far along he is with his moustache endeavor. For your viewing pleasure, I put his latest photo alongside a picture of what he looked like before he started growing his 'stache. As you can see, he has quite a baby face underneath that facial hair.


There's still time to contribute to this cause! Read more info below about how to donate and where your donation goes.

To make a donation, you can either:
* Click this link http://us.movember.com/mospace/8010/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account , or

* Write a check payable to Movember Foundation, referencing Registration Number 8010, and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 2726, Venice, CA 90294-2726.

All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
The Prostate Cancer Foundation will use the money raised by Movember to fund research to find better treatments and a cure for prostate cancer.

The Lance Armstrong Foundation will use the money raised by Movember to fund:
* The LIVESTRONG Young Adult Alliance program which has the goal of improving survival rates and quality of life for young adults with cancer between the ages of 15 and 40.

* Research initiatives to further understand the biology of adolescent and young adult cancers.

For more details on how the funds raised from previous campaigns have been used go to: http://us.movemberfoundation.com/research-and-programs/

Please help me by helping support my Uncle Matthew. And if you're so inclined, please tell him Bogey sent you!

Why?

I'm still working on uploading all the pictures from the family's trip to Florida. And by "still working" I mean "I haven't even started because I'm still looking at the camera, which is still inside its bag, and I have no intention of uploading the photos until I get the urge to do so... probably in another week or two."

So, in the meantime, I thought I'd post a video clip of one of my favorite comedians, Louis C.K. He pretty much nails what it's like around our house trying to raise Claire in a "positive" atmosphere. Plus, he does a bit at the end of the clip that is almost identical to every single conversation Stew has with Claire these days. Before I was a stay-at-home dog, I thought people were over exaggerating when they said toddlers ask a lot of questions. Boy was I wrong. Watch this...



For the NSFW (Not Safe For Work) and much longer version of this video, go HERE.

Home, Sweet Home!

'Mid pleasures and palaces though we may roam;
Be it ever so humble, there's no place like home!

Momma, Claire and Stew made it home from Florida late Monday afternoon. I'm sure I'll have pictures of Claire frolicking in the ocean at some point. In the meantime, all you really need to know about the trip is Stew gained seven pounds while away. That's right, seven pounds in five days! So much for the 14.5 pound weight-loss (and washboard abs) he achieved prior to the vacation...

In other news, even when you experience changes in your daily routine, it's always good to know some things never change. Such as the continuous misrepresentations and propaganda spewing on the Fox News Channel. Take a look...

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Sean Hannity Uses Glenn Beck's Protest Footage
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

Going rogue!

I'm going rogue, y'all! But fear not my four faithful bloggees... this doesn't mean I'm quitting my blog after just a few years so I can launch zingers at my critics from the comfort of my Facebook page. No, I'll leave that strategy to the professional rogues. Speaking of which, have you ever looked up the definition of "rogue"?

Main Entry: ¹rogue

Pronunciation: \ˈrōg\

Function: noun

Etymology: origin unknown

Date: 1561

1 : vagrant, tramp
2 : a dishonest or worthless person : scoundrel, Alaskan governor
3 : a mischievous person : scamp, unqualified VP candidate
4 : a horse inclined to shirk or misbehave (huh?)
5 : an individual exhibiting a chance and usually inferior biological variation (such as incessant winking)

Now, I realize "going rogue" has a different interpretation than the word "rogue", but I didn't want my valuable word research to go to waste. And speaking of waste, you all might remember last year Momma and Stew dressed up as Sarah Palin and Joe Six-Pack, respectively. Well, this year they didn't have any occasion to dress up, which is unfortunate because Momma was planning to go as Sarah Palin's new book by wearing a nice jacket but not making any sense. Okay, okay... that's not really my joke. I stole it from Peter Sagal, host of NPR's Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me!. And if there are any Teabaggers still visiting this blog, you need to know NPR is an acronym for National Public Radio. I know you think public radio is for crazy liberals who only like thoughtful and erudite journalism (as opposed to Right Wing spin and outright lies found on Fox News), but NPR provides fantastic entertainment (see also Car Talk, Whad'Ya Know?, and for the really high-brow liberals there's A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor).

Getting back to my "going rogue" plans... You see, Momma, Claire and Stew are flying off to Florida tomorrow to visit a majority of Stew's family (pretty much everybody except Uncle StewCat and family, who have gone rogue and still live in SoDak). So while my family is away, I plan to party like it's 1999... which is easier than y'all might think since Prince's studio - Paisley Park Studio - is only about 10 minutes from our house over there in Chanhassen. One thing I'm planning to do is taser me a squirrel and barbecue it on the grill. Then maybe I'll head down to the basement to order up some On-Demand movies on the big TV (probably Underdog or some other movie about a heroic canine). Then again, I'm told Auntie Karen will be here to stay with me for a few days, so I'll probably just relax and hang out with her. She has awesome fingernails for scratching behind my ears! Yea... I'm thinking maybe I should plan to go rogue another time. I need to take advantage of being pampered and actually having someone feed and water me on a daily basis.