It's such a fine line between stupid and clever...

It all started on June 25, 1968, in the maternity ward of Saint Mary's Hospital in Pierre, SD. Jeffrey "Franny" Fransen and Brett "StewDog" Stewart - while still in diapers - joined forces to become FranDog... one of the most influential soft rock duos to ever originate in South Dakota. From their breakout hit, "You can change my diaper, but you can't change me" to their 1986 best-selling ballad, "It's not stalking 'cause I love you", FranDog's awkward (and often times creepy) sound brought them great commercial success yet little favor with the ladies... especially throughout their heyday of the 1980's. Franny once said, "Making girls cry is second nature to us." StewDog added, "We're damn good at it, and it's a gift we want to share with the world." Please join FranDog for their 40-year Reunion Concert. Only gifts meant to humiliate the two are acceptable. Additionally, female fans are encouraged to refrain from throwing panties in FranDog's direction. The act of doing so is so 1986...

Anyone within reading distance of this posting is invited to attend. However, please note that if you EVER dated Stew (not including Momma), then you will be turned away at the door because we don't need any psychopaths showing up... besides, we'll have our hands and paws full just keeping a handle on Uncle Franny.

So, maybe you bought a high quality chair at a modest price from Stew back when he was (an award-winning) furniture sales rep... Perhaps Uncle Franny was a political strategist on your failed run for office... Maybe you share something in common with both members of FranDog (i.e., you've also puked in the back seat of Uncle Jimmy's 1980 Ford Granada)... Or, maybe you shared a jail cell with Stew and kept calling him "Rex" (I'm talking to you, Leonard Blue Thunder)! Regardless of your affiliation with FranDog, please show up to Decoy's in Downtown Hopkins on Saturday, June 28th. We told the bar we'd have 75 people in attendance but, as it turns out, FranDog only has about a half-dozen fans. So, we need some help. And to make it very easy for you, simply right-click on the guest pass below, hit "copy", open Word, hit "paste" and print as many of them as you need. Then, on the evening of June 28th, load up your Griswold Family Truckster and head to Downtown Hopkins. It's just that easy... but please RSVP to bogart.stewart@gmail.com as soon as you can if you plan to attend. The bar would like to know an approximate number of guests to expect in case they need to hire extra security guards.