Going rogue!

I'm going rogue, y'all! But fear not my four faithful bloggees... this doesn't mean I'm quitting my blog after just a few years so I can launch zingers at my critics from the comfort of my Facebook page. No, I'll leave that strategy to the professional rogues. Speaking of which, have you ever looked up the definition of "rogue"?

Main Entry: ¹rogue

Pronunciation: \ˈrōg\

Function: noun

Etymology: origin unknown

Date: 1561

1 : vagrant, tramp
2 : a dishonest or worthless person : scoundrel, Alaskan governor
3 : a mischievous person : scamp, unqualified VP candidate
4 : a horse inclined to shirk or misbehave (huh?)
5 : an individual exhibiting a chance and usually inferior biological variation (such as incessant winking)

Now, I realize "going rogue" has a different interpretation than the word "rogue", but I didn't want my valuable word research to go to waste. And speaking of waste, you all might remember last year Momma and Stew dressed up as Sarah Palin and Joe Six-Pack, respectively. Well, this year they didn't have any occasion to dress up, which is unfortunate because Momma was planning to go as Sarah Palin's new book by wearing a nice jacket but not making any sense. Okay, okay... that's not really my joke. I stole it from Peter Sagal, host of NPR's Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me!. And if there are any Teabaggers still visiting this blog, you need to know NPR is an acronym for National Public Radio. I know you think public radio is for crazy liberals who only like thoughtful and erudite journalism (as opposed to Right Wing spin and outright lies found on Fox News), but NPR provides fantastic entertainment (see also Car Talk, Whad'Ya Know?, and for the really high-brow liberals there's A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor).

Getting back to my "going rogue" plans... You see, Momma, Claire and Stew are flying off to Florida tomorrow to visit a majority of Stew's family (pretty much everybody except Uncle StewCat and family, who have gone rogue and still live in SoDak). So while my family is away, I plan to party like it's 1999... which is easier than y'all might think since Prince's studio - Paisley Park Studio - is only about 10 minutes from our house over there in Chanhassen. One thing I'm planning to do is taser me a squirrel and barbecue it on the grill. Then maybe I'll head down to the basement to order up some On-Demand movies on the big TV (probably Underdog or some other movie about a heroic canine). Then again, I'm told Auntie Karen will be here to stay with me for a few days, so I'll probably just relax and hang out with her. She has awesome fingernails for scratching behind my ears! Yea... I'm thinking maybe I should plan to go rogue another time. I need to take advantage of being pampered and actually having someone feed and water me on a daily basis.