August 29, 2007

This and That

This: A nice visit
Well, Grandma & Grandpa headed back to the farm Monday morning in their brand new Buick Lucerne automobile. Let me just say that this is not your familiar Oldsmobuick. The Lucerne is quite snappy and sharp looking. Grandpa Bob even got a $250 discount from the auto dealership just for taking a test drive prior to purchase. So, when Stew got to drive the Lucerne to the Hackenmueller Meat Market in luxurious downtown Robbinsdale to buy some cold cuts for lunch on Friday, he was quite disappointed to learn that Grandpa had no intentions of paying him $250 for the test drive. Instead, Grandpa brought a yardstick home from the fair on Saturday for Stew. Anyway, we had a real nice visit and even got a chance to shoot some photos. The photo at right is Claire and me with Grandma & Grandpa in the backyard on Sunday. Speaking of Sunday, we had a bunch of people named "Schaefbauer" over for drinks and snacks. I'm told that Grandpa's mom once had the last name "Schaefbauer", so Grandpa is somehow related to all the people who showed up Sunday. All I know is that I was on guard duty. Plus, Stew gave me a special assignment. He told me that if I hear the words "red eye" that I was to bite him by the shorts and drag him from the premises and detain him until all the guests leave. Apparently, Red Eye is some sort of drink concoction consisting mainly of Everclear (pure grain alcohol) that the Schaefbauers are known to consume in mass quantities at family gatherings. So, Stew was giving me the authority for a pre-emptive strike to save him from making a fool of himself after drinking any Red Eye (and embarassing the rest of us family members for that matter). Luckily, no Red Eye appeared at the gathering... but a herd of bees showed up out of nowhere. So Stew ran inside to grab some fly swatters. Nothing jazzes up a backyard gathering better than inciting a swarm of bees by swatting them with a fly swatter.

And that: The idiot box
I spent most of Monday and Tuesday in the basement with Stew doing laundry and watching the idiot channel (Fox News Channel). We like to read news stories on the web (i.e., other blogs, independent news sources, etc...) then watch Fox report on those same stories. It's like story hour with Claire except the Fox commentators don't rhyme when they tell their stories. Speaking of the latest story set in Minneapolis... can we finally stop referring to the Republican party as "the family values party"? Seems to me a more fitting description would be "the party of lewd bathroom behavior". Their slogan could be "I am NOT gay... but my bathroom buddy is." Keep in mind Stew was a registered Republican and voted for Bush in 2000 before finally coming to his senses. Somehow this fact makes me feel better about bashing this bunch of hypocrits in Washington. Many of the Dems aren't much better, but at least (for now) none of them seem to be participating in any bathroom badminton. Instead, they prefer to stock their freezers full of thousands of dollars stolen from American taxpayers. It's not a good time for my home state of Louisiana (see Sen. David "Hooker" Vitter or Rep. William "The Freezer" Jefferson).

Below is an example of how my second favorite Fox News douche bag, Bill O'Reilly (2nd only to Sean Hannity) attacks the son of a 9-11 victim then distorts the facts later to make the guy look like a whacko. There's nothing quite like the Fox News brand of "journalism"...

1 comments:

Anonymous 4:52 PM  

Are you kidding me with that clip. All creatures of the canie variety should be embarassed that a "fox" is even a 4-legged fur covered animal and that we are in ANYWAY associated with this vile network.

Go Al, you're the man! Later Boggiedude.

Remmy

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About This Blog

Commentary from a stay-at-home dad on daily happenings and misadventures while helping raise a wonderful little girl. The goal is to employ wit, sarcasm and/or humor to make the blog pseudo-entertaining. Then again, setting goals never really worked for me, but maybe you'll chuckle anyway.

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