January 09, 2009

Mission Accomplished!

Well, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first? The bad news, you say? I suppose it's good to get the bad news out of the way first because when we deny our pain, trouble is sure to follow. Sometimes, things get so complicated that we feel hurt or guilty about feeling bad. That can set up a trap, unless you can somehow remember that it's perfectly canine (or human) to feel hurt once in a while. Feeling hurt when something bad has happened is actually good. It's positive proof for me that there's life on Planet Bogart. When I hear the bad news first, I've saved the best for last. That way, when I move on to the next crisis or the next preoccupation, I'm charged up from the good news I've just heard. Maybe that's why we eat dessert at the end of the meal. Now please pass me another pig's ear.

So, what were we talking about? Oh, that's right... the bad news. The bad news is that I think we're probably going to be moving back to Robbinsdale. The good news is that the Macy's Department Store in the Brookdale Mall near our old house is closing [source]. Yeah! Momma has accomplished yet another goal in her life. And for those who don't know, the main reason we moved away from Robbinsdale is because of a horrid experience Momma had with a sales clerk at this Macy's. Forget the fact the local school district was nearly bankrupt when we moved. That's a minor issue in comparison to a sales clerk who refuses to do her job. I'll spare you the details, but Momma came home from Macy's that night and announced, "We have to get out of this [bleep] town" (please note I've cleaned up her actual comment considerably for this blog posting). So, not only did we move away soon afterwards, but Momma has been boycotting Macy's ever since... waging her own personal vendetta against the Macy's organization and all those who support it. Well, everyone except Grandpa Bob, who absolutely loves the Brookdale Macy's. You see, there's always a 60% off sale every September when he and Grandma come to visit. It's like Macy's knows when he's coming to town. Weird. So every September, Grandpa goes home with some fancy shirts from Macy's. Sometimes he'll even pick up a fall jacket. Anyway, I can only assume that we're moving back to Robbinsdale after hearing this good news. There's really no reason not to return. Then again, I think we sort of like it here in Chaska, so perhaps I'm misinterpreting the hoots, hollars and "Hurrays!" coming out of Momma's mouth last night after hearing the news about Macy's. Come to think of it, Momma might have been celebrating after learning that Stew actually showered yesterday. Who knows? Either way, it was a good day for all of us.

And since this is a teaching blog, allow me to share some words of advice from Stew for those out there in sales or some other customer-driven vocation. Remember, Stew won awards when he was selling high quality furni
ture at a modest price, so he knows of what he speaks. One day he tells me, "Bogart, it doesn't matter if the product or service you're selling is total sh!t as long as you provide exceptional customer service to your client." Adding, "I should know... I once sold my favorite Minneapolis architectural firm an entire office of drafting table stools without any seats. Then it took about four weeks to resolve the simple matter, but the firm still promotes my products to this day. Come to think of it, they probably just felt sorry for me and my former company. So, forget what I said about customer service. It's not important. What's important is looking so pathetic that your customer feels obligated to buy from you." Words to live by. I'm certain this is how Stew got Momma to marry him, too. The man is a genius disguised as a blockhead.


Anonymous 10:29 AM  

We thought of Linda as well when we heard the news. Macy's should have known better then to endure Linda's wrath. Silly, silly people...


Mike Rios 7:18 AM  

First Steve and Barry's. And now Macy's. Is there anything left in that mall? Maybe Stew could sell Stay at Home Dog t-shirts out of some of the open retail space.

Anonymous 3:49 PM  

Hey! Someone from your favorite architectural firm reads this blog ya know???!!!!
The stools still look great!

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About This Blog

Commentary from a stay-at-home dad on daily happenings and misadventures while helping raise a wonderful little girl. The goal is to employ wit, sarcasm and/or humor to make the blog pseudo-entertaining. Then again, setting goals never really worked for me, but maybe you'll chuckle anyway.

OUR FAMILY - Provides a brief bio on each family member.

THE SAHD CLUB - A rip-off of the letter written by the kids from the 1980's blockbuster hit, The Breakfast Club.

THE DOG DISH - Here you'll find the occasional rant or story written from a dog's point of view.

COMEDY - Here you'll find stuff I think is funny, typically video clips, cartoons or jokes.

LINKS - Just what the name implies.

PAW-LITICS - More rants, typically directed at despicable politicians with whom I disagree.

VIDEO VAULT - Home videos of Claire set to some of our favorite songs.

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