May 22, 2009

Busy as a.... beaver?

Sorry for the lack of postings, but I've been busy lately. Now, I'm no expert on the work ethic of the American Beaver, but I am familiar with popular English animal-based idioms. Although, come to think of it, I believe the bee is the busy critter I'm thinking of while the beaver falls more into the "eager" category. What I am certain of is that it IS possible to grab a bull by its horns. And you can kill two birds with one stone, but is this theory applicable to squirrels? Sort of makes you think, doesn't it? I know having ants in your pants is not necessarily a bad thing, and herding cats is apparently a difficult proposition (which is why I elect to simply eat them). Speaking of cats, it is not a good idea to let the cat out of the bag. Again, another good reason for simply tossing the entire (preferably burlap) bag of cats into the nearest river or lake. I'm told every dog has its day, but I'm still waiting for mine. Perhaps I'll join the next traveling dog and pony show that comes through town and live high on the hog? Then again that could stir up a hornet's nest around here. I mean, who would take care of Claire if I left? Stew's like a fish out of water around toddlers. And I don't mean to get up on my high horse, but Stew's like a small dog in tall weeds when it comes to parenting, and you can't teach an old dog like him new tricks. Let's face it - Stew's stubborn as a mule. Plus, Claire is still only knee-high to a grasshopper and is happy as a dog with two tails, but Chaska isn't a little one-horse town. I mean, it's a dog eat dog world out there, so Claire needs some positive influence! We don't want her walking into the lion's den unprepared. Rather, we want her growing up knowing the world is her oyster. And while Stew was (and still is) somewhat of the black sheep of his family and still manages to make an ass of himself on a consistent basis, I'm still confident Claire will continue to make me as proud as a peacock while she grows up. In the meantime, going down the slide at the playground is the bee in Claire's bonnet. And if she sees her stroller or the bike + Burley, it's like waving a red flag in front of a bull. All you can do is get out of the way while she charges as fast as she can and jumps into one of her rides and announces, "To the slide!"

Speaking of bike rides in the Burley, Stew and Claire have been going on lots of trips lately... ever since Stew found a dollar bill while riding around the "Richie Rich" neighborhood by the local golf course. Stew's so proud because he thinks he's debunked the theory that money grows on trees wherever rich people dwell. Apparently, since he found the dollar bill on the ground, he hypothesizes that money grows up from the dirt. Sort of like rhubarb. Unfortunately, he's yet to find anymore money growing in the golf course neighborhood, so he assumes he was simply too late for the annual dollar harvest. Better luck next year, Stew.

"This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former greenskeeper and now about to become The Masters champion ... He's on his final hole. He's about 455 yards away, he's gonna hit about a 2 iron I think ... IT'S IN THE HOLE!"

"Can you smell it? I smell mean girls!" Claire senses the presence of the older neighborhood girls who give her dirty looks because they don't like it when Claire messes with their sand sculptures in the community playground sandbox.
Playtime with Momma on Mother's Day
Horsing around on a duck...
Speaking of ducks... here's Claire checking out little ducklings at the local Tractor Supply Company (don't ask what Stew was doing taking her there...).


"Look, Ma... no hands!"

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About This Blog

Commentary from a stay-at-home dad on daily happenings and misadventures while helping raise a wonderful little girl. The goal is to employ wit, sarcasm and/or humor to make the blog pseudo-entertaining. Then again, setting goals never really worked for me, but maybe you'll chuckle anyway.

OUR FAMILY - Provides a brief bio on each family member.

THE SAHD CLUB - A rip-off of the letter written by the kids from the 1980's blockbuster hit, The Breakfast Club.

THE DOG DISH - Here you'll find the occasional rant or story written from a dog's point of view.

COMEDY - Here you'll find stuff I think is funny, typically video clips, cartoons or jokes.

LINKS - Just what the name implies.

PAW-LITICS - More rants, typically directed at despicable politicians with whom I disagree.

VIDEO VAULT - Home videos of Claire set to some of our favorite songs.

BUY STUFF - My online store (that is if I ever actually create one).
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