December 19, 2007

Please help my Uncle Kermit... he's sick.

My apologies for the lack of posting lately. I'm sure my four faithful bloggies are upset, and I don't blame you. Unfortunately, living with Stew these past couple years has rubbed off on me. Meaning, I'm now incapable of completing even the simplest project on schedule. Come to think of it, I've started watching The View more regularly. Yikes! I'm more like Stew than I thought. Anyway, I've been forced to help with our annual Christmas card and newsletter mailing. Instead of starting The Stewart Family Barker newsletter a few weeks ago, Stew decided to try completing it in one night. He was up until 4am Sunday night (Monday morning). Then, after we reviewed the newsletter together Monday afternoon, I ended up changing more than half of it. We spent part of today stuffing envelopes, so the first mailing should go out tomorrow. And we usually end up with more mailings later after realizing we forgot somebody on our list...

In the meantime, I'm still in shock. I'm sure you all heard about Britney Spears' little 16-year old sister being pregnant. If not, then forgive me for not realizing that you likely have a life and/or a job and don't spend every waking moment scouring the internet for salacious gossip. Unfortunately, the only thing shocking about this story is: 1) it didn't happen three years earlier and 2) it's not Britney who is pregnant again (yet). Anyway, I don't mean to ridicule our country's very own Redneck Royalty that is The Spears Family of my home state of Louisiana, but c'mon, Y'all... see if you can guess which person in this photo is the 16-year old girl. I rest my case. If Momma starts dressing like Claire when Claire becomes a teenager, then I'm calling in the fellas with the white coats and straight jackets.

Anyway, the real reason I'm in shock is due to the passing of a great American singer-songwriter, Dan Fogelberg, on Sunday. I'm a huge fan of his music (well, mainly the stuff from the 1970's), so it's sad to learn of his passing. Aunt Susan sent an email titled The day the music died with a link to this story. I knew if there were only one other Dan Fogelberg fan in the world, it would be Aunt Susan. But I know lots of people enjoyed his music.

Just for a moment I was back at school,
And felt that old familiar pain;
And as I turned to make my way back home,
The snow turned into rain...

Well, for the past several days, my Uncle Kermit has been emailing me blog ideas. For example, one day he emailed me a link to a website with the question "Can this go on the blog?" in the subject line of the email. I'm posting the link, but before you click on it, I need to warn you. IT IS NOT SAFE FOR GRANDMAS (NSFG)! It's something I've decided to call "Scroto-art" from some artist who seems to think male genitalia is art. You be the judge... if you dare. HERE it is.

And here's another picture he sent. No explanation... just this picture. I'm not sure what it is or from whence it came, but I am certain that I do not want to know the answer to either question. My theory is that these are two of Kermit's Quake pals he must've met online. For those who don't know, Quake is some sort of computer video game in which players take on the role of a soldier sent into a portal to stop an enemy. This brief description alone is enough to give you and idea about the type of person who would actually play this game. Say it with me: nerd.

And here's a video Uncle Kermit sent me that defies definition. I'm guessing this is what Kermit would do if he lived alone in a crappy apartment in Germany like this guy. It's just a guess, but I'm thinking I'm dead on.




And finally... here's a picture of Uncle Kermit taken at last year's RAGBRAI (the Register's Annual Great Bike Ride Across Iowa), a 7-day bike ride across Iowa. Lance Armstrong, multiple winner of the Tour de France, showed up at RAGBRAI. Being the competitor he is, Uncle Kermit took exception to being passed by Armstrong in the home stretch of the Mountain Stage of RAGBRAI (which takes place in the not-so-widely-known-about mountainous area of Central Iowa). You see, the winner of the Mountain Stage gets first dibs on Mr. Porkchop's offerings at the evening BBQ (http://www.mrporkchop.com). And Uncle Kermit is deadly serious about his grilled meats.

Photo courtesy of Peter Karl Photography

"Make a lasting impression with a little Peter - Peter Karl Photography."




2 comments:

Mike Rios 12:22 PM  

OOOHHHHH!!!!! MY EYES, MY EYES!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!!! Bogart, can't you control this madness? That was a bean bag, hellish nightmare.

Anonymous 5:49 PM  

Well, when you clump it all together like that, even I'm a little disturbed. And I'm his wife. ...although I have to admit - disturbed, but also thoroughly entertained. Which is the beauty of Kermit. :-)

Susan

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Commentary from a stay-at-home dad on daily happenings and misadventures while helping raise a wonderful little girl. The goal is to employ wit, sarcasm and/or humor to make the blog pseudo-entertaining. Then again, setting goals never really worked for me, but maybe you'll chuckle anyway.

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